Praying and the Altar - The Christian Online Magazine

Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld
His love from me! Psalm 66:20 (NLT)

Recently in my quiet time with God, I stumbled on this verse. It’s probably always been there, but it took me by surprise as I don’t remember ever having read it in just this way before. Immediately I wrote it down on an index card and posted it so I could see it often and be reminded of what it says. Because you see, it is the story of my life.

So many times I have wondered if God was actually hearing my prayers, much less responding to them. I have always prayed a lot, sometimes even responding in the middle of the night. There are so many needs, and so people many to pray about: Husband, children, grandchildren, elderly parents, and much more. During various trials in my life—deaths, losses, injuries to me or others, I wondered if God was even there. Maybe He was just busy or distracted, I wasn’t sure. One time I told God, “You don’t hug so good.” Believe me, I was shocked to realize I had just prayed that.

There have been times of prayer where I would have given anything for the answer I wanted, without even really thinking about or caring what His Will was for my life. Then too, there have been times when I have been so desolate, so overwhelmed with loss or fear, that I have promised God anything and everything if only He would answer and rescue me.

At one point in my life, I promised Him everything if He would save the life of my unborn child; three of my children are now in heaven with Him. I learned that no matter how much I already loved them, He loved them more and had a different plan. I have no doubt they are well cared for, and there is complete confidence I will get to meet them someday.

Again on my knees in a time of deep desperation, I gave Him all of my rights: To love, to happiness, and joy. I gave Him the rights to my children, my house, my car, anything and everything that I could place on that altar, I did. Then my husband left me for someone else, my two-income house was foreclosed, and I had to file bankruptcy. I was forced to give up my children for a year, and I truly believed that there was no more shame or horror that I could bear.

I was homeless for a year, and during that time my children lived with their dad. I had a job, but that was about all. Everything I owned was in a storage unit; all that I had with me were my clothes and my Bible. That year He taught me that I didn’t need all of those things to survive or even to live. All I ever really needed was Him.

One at a time He took my “rights,” which I had so blithely laid on the altar. In return He brought amazing answers. For the year that I was homeless, I was asked to house-sit a beautiful home simply to pet the cat and water the plants. It was so big and overwhelming, I found myself staying in just three rooms.

Worth more than half a million dollars, the home had magnificent views, was beautifully furnished and all at no cost to me. I know that God was laughing the entire time I was pleading for any place to live because He KNEW what He had in mind for me all along.

Never again, I thought, would I have a home of my own, a stable address or even a home telephone number. Nothing permanent would be a part of my life for the rest of my days. Never again would I have a marriage or any type of life but that of single mother. In fact, I had told God that I was never again going to be interested in marriage. I already had someone precious who slept in my bed on their back and snored: My dog, DaisyMae.

The major lesson I have learned from my prayers is that I must be unwaveringly certain that whatever I lay on the altar, I must be willing to give it up. He may take it all or just some to clear the way for my growth and His purpose. Now when I pray, I am very honest and clear with myself as well as God, never offering a part of my life unless I am entirely sure I am willing to give it to Him.

I am truly convinced that our God has a great sense of humor, and He delights in answering prayers in ways I could never imagine. Now, several years later, I am married to a wonderful man. We have a lovely home where my grandchildren come to play. Now, my children are all grown and gone, and I have a real address and telephone number.

Although I may never understand what He is doing, He does not reject my prayers. His mercy and loving-kindness have never been withheld from me, and never will.

Desirée L.M. Pheister is a member of Abundant Living Church and writes as God leads to bless others. She is the mother of three grown children and a grandmother of five. You may reach her at: marrion8955@yahoo.com